Dear Music,
​
It’s only fitting that I finally attempt to write a song for you. And by a song, I mean an open letter of thanks. Thank you for all that you have done for me, but especially for being the steadfast companion that you have been. As there is so much that I could say, to name all the times that you have enriched my life and to thank you for it all would be an incredibly difficult feat. However, in this letter I’ll start with five - five instances that you were there for me in ways that I am extraordinarily thankful for.
​
For the time I felt a pain so deep that I thought I would never recover yet you helped me to, I thank you... Losing my maternal grandmother is the hardest loss that I have ever experienced. She was my role model, my mentor, and my best friend. When she passed, I thought I would be out of sorts forever. However, not only did you help me overcome this pain, you instilled in me the belief that my grandma will live on in many ways, including through music itself.
The song "Corre" by Jesse y Joy (“corre” is Spanish for “run”) is a beautiful pop ballad. As a result of its gentle piano-guitar melody and its hypnotizing piano-guitar-drums bridge, this song makes me physically feel the uphill battle that is loss. However, similar to the end of this song when its complex bridge comes to an end, at the end of the uphill battle that is grief there is acceptance, remembrance, and a slight sensation of peace.
This song was my grandmother and I's song and everytime I hear it, I feel like I’m back in her arms. The first time that I heard it was in a Colombian soap opera that I watched with her as a young girl. The song tells the story of a woman singing to her significant other, telling him to run and to leave her life as she feels that he will never be able to love her the way that she loves him. Though this song is not at all about a grandmother-granddaughter relationship, when I hear it I think of summers in Colombia watching telenovelas with my grandma; I think of the first time I sang for her when my family did karaoke on our first family trip and the way she cheered me on the whole time; and, I think about how even though she is no longer with me physically, she will always be with me spiritually.
​
For the way that you comfort me in my loneliness, providing me the support I need to cry, scream, or occasionally hit my pillow. But also, for the way that you allow me to feel less lonely, accompanying me with your song... You comfort me, while also allowing me the space to vent my sadness and for that I am so incredibly thankful.
The song “High” by Miley Cyrus featured on her album “Plastic Hearts,” objectively some of her best work, is one of my most trusted companions when I’m feeling lost or alone. For a lack of better words, to listen to this song is an ethereal experience as everything about it is magic. From the strong presence of the acoustic guitar to Cyrus' powerful, seemingly echoed vocals which lead to a symphonic feel, all of it sends the best kind of chills down my spine.
"High" tells the story of someone who is sad, yet someone who finds a silver lining amidst this darkness and hurt. Only to lose it just as quickly as they found it, leaving them hopeless again. It tells the story of coming to terms with this, accepting it, but never forgetting. And when this loss is remembered, a distinct “high” follows. Whether I’m mourning the loss of a failed or unrequited love, or I’m simply feeling out of place in the world, this song makes me feel less alone. It reminds me that we are all living a life which, similar to a rollercoaster, has its endless surges of ups and downs. Thus, my life too will always find its way back up, back to good, so long as I believe that it can.
​
For the way that you are able to make me feel nostalgic for my own past and for pasts that I’ve never known, I thank you... Nostalgia is one of my favorite emotions so, I always love when it trickles over me and reminds me just how beautiful life is.
The song “International Players Anthem” by UGK released in the early 2000’s tells the story of a notorious heartbreaker who has finally found the girl with whom he wants to spend the rest of his life. In the song he writes to all the girls whose hearts he broke prior to meeting “the one” and he apologizes for all his wrongs. Though I in no way relate to this, and though I wasn’t even of a double digit age when this song was climbing the charts, it ignites my nostalgia like no other. This song, with its silly adlibs, warm & whimsical harmonies, and everything in between, is enjoyable from start to finish. It makes me happy, it makes me smile, and it makes me feel like I lived out my 20s in the early 2000s, bootcut, low-rise jeans and all.
Music, your power to do this astonishes me. Your ability to transport me to an entirely different lifetime through the sentiments that you are able to inflict in me baffle me yet excite me all the while. It excites me to think about all the places and lives that I can live vicariously through you.
​
For the way that you are able to make me feel like I know exactly what romantic love feels like even though I haven’t experienced it yet...Thanks to you, I’d imagine it feels like an engulfing warm embrace after a long, cold day; like an anchor to keep me grounded when life tries to sway me astray; or, like an invisible string that, against all odds, remains tethered to another. Music, you’ve prepared me for what this love will feel like and you’ve made me excited at the prospect of experiencing it someday.
As naive as this may sound, at this point in time, I’m certain that the song “I Was Born To Love You” by Ray LaMontagne will play at my wedding. With his voice as smooth as honey, an acoustic guitar as piercing and engulfing as a romantic embrace, and lyrics as beautiful as the most colorful sunset, this song makes me feel as though I’ve loved a million times over. It makes me feel as though I’ve had the privilege of being loved by the one, true love of my life. In this song, LaMontage sings of a love that was meant to be; he sings of a love so strong and so pure that it can withstand absolutely anything and everything. Though I one day wish to experience such a love, I genuinely believe that I can always come back to this song and be reminded of what it’ll be like before it arrives.
​
Euphoria
“Ocean Drive” by Duke Dumont
For the way that you are able to make me feel like the full throttle drive along the highway, windows down and music loud, is the drive to paradise... Paradise, a distant land where anything goes and everyone is truly and utterly happy. Nothing else is able to give me goosebumps, raise the hairs on my body, and make me feel as content the way that you do. I don’t ever plan on trying hallucinogens in my life, however the euphoric high you often impose on me makes me feel as though I’ve known a glimpse of what that’s like.
The song “Ocean Drive” by Duke Dumont, arguably the most popular one that I am mentioning in this letter to you, is one of the songs that serves as my ticket to a high so euphoric that I forget about all of the evil in the world just for a moment. I am persuaded to just live and be free by the dynamic electronic backtrack of the song and vocals so rich and electrifying.
I’ll never forget where I was and how I felt when I heard this song for the first time. And each time I’ve heard it since, I'm reminded of that night. That night, as I sat passenger side, driving along Ocean Drive in South Beach, I felt invincible. It was my first time traveling to visit my family in Florida without my mom. I was only 15, but in that moment, surrounded by my cousins, purple highway lights, the monstrous crashing waves of the ocean, and engulfed by Ocean Drive, I felt infinite. Everytime I hear this song, I remember summers from my younger days, I remember blinding lights (in the best way), and I remember happiness.
​
​